the Real Ender Wiggin

I started reading Ender’s Game a while ago. Haven’t read Ender since 2005 (almost three years!) so I’ve got most of my mind clear and am now ready to meet the real Ender Wiggin.

Background: I first read Ender’s Shadow (for an English class) then read Ender’s Game. So yes, I have Ender completely backwards in my mind. Or as a reviewer on Amazon said, “Bean is smart, clever and clearheaded ‘always’ whereas Ender looks hesitant and overwrought…”

I don’t remember my original thoughts when I went from Shadow to Game and am too lazy to search through my journal archives, but generally I think I would have agreed with that reviewer’s sentiments. I was probably confused as to why people liked Ender so much.

Reading Orson Scott Card’s introduction to Game though, I picked up on this: “These readers found that Ender’s Game was not merely a ‘mythic’ story, dealing with general truths, but something much more personal…. They didn’t love Ender, or pity Ender (a frequent adult response); they were Ender, all of them.”

That explained a lot to me. I read Ender’s Game first when I was about 18, past the stage of outcast child. I pitied Ender. It explained why my feelings about Ender were different from my friends’. I was reading it from an adult’s perspective.

I was also reading from a perspective of someone who never felt like an outcast because of my intelligence. (No, I felt different because I’m a little weird. :P) There were lots of classmates smarter than I was. In fact, I felt stupid in elementary school and middle school … and high school … because those classmates excelled much more than I did. Sure, I didn’t struggle too much in school (except with writing), but that didn’t set me apart.

Knowing that, and not remembering Bean’s side of things, I can read the story with a clean slate. :3

One thing I’d like to comment on in that review; “Where does Bean get the experience to become Enders [sic] ‘supervisor?’ I don’t know but he is deemed fit enough with a couple months as a team leader to be fleet commander.”

Again, I don’t remember the specifics (and I’ve got horrible dizzying headache pressure and can’t think straight), but Bean was really smart, a super brain. He knew and understood a lot of things, practically everything. But he doesn’t have the “human” side to him that Ender does, which Bean knew. Wasn’t that also the reason why Bean knew Ender had to lead? Bean was more of a backup to Ender; if Ender failed, Bean would be there as one last chance to beat the Buggers.

But that thought doesn’t lead anywhere in this entry.

(Also, funny additional comment by the reviewer about Inda. XD)

Continue reading “the Real Ender Wiggin”

Shadows of the game

I was reading Shadow of the Giant, and I really liked one part that I read. ^_^;; The part where … uhhh … possible spoiler ahead … Ender’s “jeesh” got together. I don’t know why. It was just … fun. Like going back to the beginning, back to when the story was good.

(I don’t know why I keep reading the Shadow series. I thought Hegemon was poor, other than the war plotting and logistics and codes and whatnot. And in Giant, I don’t even really care about these characters. I mean, sure, I care about them, but that’s just because I cared about them in Ender’s Game and Ender’s Shadow; it’s like they’re riding off of someone else’s popularity. I just want to know how the kids from that story end up.)

2005 book list

Wheee, I remembered to update. :P Here’s a list of all the books I managed to read in 2005 (plus a few from 2004 >.>). (List started January 22, 2005.) I was trying to read 100 books in one year. I didn’t read that many, just half (including the few from 2004 ^^;). Another goal I’d like to accomplish in life is to read 100 books in one year! (Even though that would amount to reading one book every 3.65 days. …Unless I did it in a leap year, then it’d be 3.66 days…)

It’s kind of weird. I look over the list, and I think, Wow, I read that book then? It seems like so long ago… Like The Handmaid’s Tale or The Unbearable Lightness of Being. I want to reread Ender’s Shadow again. XD (Even though I already have about a half dozen books on my to-read list, not including class required reading. *ack*)

Also, wow, I’m gone for only one week and WordPress is updated. Hmmm, maybe I should leave other things alone and maybe they’ll get updated too… (Note to self, upgrade WordPress after backing up current state.)

Continue reading “2005 book list”

so I close my eyes

-.-;; Mum just told me to get off a couple minutes ago and go to bed, so I closed everything. Then she realized my brother wasn’t asleep, so she shouldn’t make me go to sleep either. o.O Oh well. I’m gonna get off after this anyway. Chippies and sodie and Martinelli’s sparkling cider in the living room. :9 And I have Good Omens to read. I also have The Sandman book 10 to read … but *sniffs* I DON’T WANNA READ IT!!! NOOOO! It can’t be over!! ;.; Well, I think I’m gonna read it anyway. ^^;;

And, woah, I just remembered this dream … except … this is really weird … I can’t remember if it was my dream, or a dream in a novel, or someone’s dream online, or … just one of those weird deja vu things … it’s kinda really confusing me. o_o And now I’ve forgotten most of it. ^^;;; Oh well.

Oh yeah … I finished Endless Nights last night. Nooo! That just leaves two books left to read that have to do with The Sandman … unless I magically come up with a couple twenties, then I can buy The Sandman Companion. ^^;

Aaanyway … new layout. Yeah. The girl is a model in this Banana Republic ad. ^_^; I just really liked that photo … And, I’m kinda wondering, what’s with this pink scrollbar out in the middle of all this grey-blue? It’s kind of … an eyesore … no?

Oh yeah! Yesterday I spent most of the afternoon/evening working on MFF. ^_^;; I think a good chunk of my time “updating” that site is spent sorting out all my floppy disks … so I think I’m gonna put all my stuff on the old compi. That’ll take a while. And … since that compi takes so long to start (about a couple minutes, I think?), I may be updating even less … but then again, I wouldn’t have to mess with the disks. So … yeah.

I haven’t updated here for over a week. How weird. When was the last time I did that? I was trying not to do that anymore. But, here’s the really weird part, I haven’t really said anything in my lj either. And I haven’t written in my diary, log, or noteook. So … weird. I don’t really feel like I haven’t been writing entries lately. Oh well.

Um … what else to say …

Okay! Today! Today Mum woke me up at 6:00 and I actually got up and got ready and everything. Everyone was ready and rolling at 6:40. ^^;; We were supposed to leave at 6:30. But oh well. We were ten minutes early anyway. N had to take a test at UTI. After that we went to IHOP and I had crépe-style pancakes. Yum.

Then we went to the Ontario Mills Mall. There’s a Vans skatepark there. o_o Sooo cool. Umm … went in quite a few stores. At the Virgin Megastore I got The Sandman book 10 (for $12 o.o!), Foo Fighter’s Single Have It All (Darling Nikki! XD), and Millenium Actress. I’m wondering, if I brought it tomorrow, would we watch it? I don’t know. I also got two blouses (pink! :b) at Forever 21 that Mum paid for. Oh yeah. I finished Shadow Puppets on the way there. It’s good, kinda. Not great. Now I get to read through the whole series again. >b

After we got home Mum agreed to take me to Circuit City to look at stuff. I bought earphones ’cause N said they were good, and some part of the plastic on my current ones are coming off. No one sells Aiwa anymore. T-T I think that sucks. Oh well. Mum said I could buy from It’s gonna be over $160. For a portable CD player (with AM/FM tuner :b) and stereo. Yeah. And after today I owe M and D $80. x_x I don’t want to use the money in my bank account anymore. So I’m not spending for a loooong time now. :(

holiday break reading

Yay! I ish back on my laptop! ^^ I haven’t been on since Friday night. I was using Hidek’s flunky computer. Blah. Sooo many restarts. *holds head*

Anyway. I don’t really know what I did over the weekend. Lot of nothing. And now I don’t know what I’m doing now. Lot of nothing. Hm.

I’m almost done with Shadow Puppets. ;-; Nooo, it’s all coming to an end.

… After I finish that I have The Bonesetter’s Daughter and Good Omens to read. And I also feel like rereading Little Women. Then there’s half a dozen books I want to read once more before I give them away. Oh yeah. Also The Da Vinci Code. ^^

And … I have The Sandman book ten to read, then Death: The High Cost of Living, then the last two stories in Endless Nights, and then I’m done with the Sandman series. ;_; It’s just too sad.