may last the rest of your life

People don’t visit my blog anymore. I feel so lonely. v.v

(It really is “a big dark echoing room” now. Maybe I should stop calling it that. *ponder*)

But I must keep up my blog, if only for myself! *super pose*

I don’t remember whatall I did Saturday. Sunday I went grocery shopping with Hidek. I mention that only because I was looking for something to clean the shower with and found a Bon Ami cleaner that says on the front, Environment Friendly, no bleach or perfumes or a couple other ingredients I don’t remember. I thought, ‘Wow, Bon Ami really is my good friend!’ (Okay yes I’m an envirodork. *grin*)

I didn’t get it though, ’cause I’m too lazy to scrub the tub. >_> I’m an environmentalist up to a point. After that I’m a germophobe and I don’t wanna touch anything that’s touching something dirty. (Seriously. Germs can, like, travel around on objects, and walk onto my hand. Or … something.) So I got Lysol shower cleaner. (Kills bacteria! Woohoo! Er, at least until someone touches it again. *furtive glance* Then it’s dirty again.)

Boring diary stuff: Monday lecture then lab. In lab we had a final project that day. We pretended we were a design firm (or something) and the teacher was our client and we all had to work in teams (or departments) then split up the work (like there was advertising, then there was … I don’t remember :x in advertising we had to make a magazine ad, certificate for something or other, product logo, and a memo pad for internal company use [I don’t get it either, but meh]). I was on the advertising team and made the memo pad. ^^;; Yeah, I thought it’d be the easiest since we couldn’t know what the product was, just what the code name was (Wonder Widget), and since in my Intro to Graphic [Communication] class at the community college I went to we had to design something like that, so it wasn’t something completely new.

Every so often the teacher would send us messages over the network (like what’s the progress? and stuff). It was fun! Well, you know, if you forget the part where I thought I’d run out of time to print it out ’cause no one else had done it yet and there was 5 minutes left of class. Ahh!!

That’s one thing I didn’t learn while working over the summer. I don’t know how to work with a deadline. There was one, but it had already passed before I started working, haha, so I was pretty much just told, “Work as fast as you can so we can get the catalogue out.” Oh well.

Last night practically right before bed I planned out most of my art journal. Woo, go me. (Dare I say “Goby!”? I haven’t played Animal Crossing in the looooongest time. *tear*) I just have to get around to actually putting it together. *shifty eyes* I’ve decided on a guinea pig as my personal theme! XD I hope I can use it again next year. *furtive glance*

Today I went to lecture, then art lab. Had a critique in art lab. It’s cool, seeing everyone’s version of a project with guidelines. I also like hearing the technical explanations of why something doesn’t work, and what would make it better. XD

I asked him later to clarify what I had to do with my project. I understand it for the one I’m going to turn in, but the other one I still don’t understand what he means by “scale everything.” ._. I thought it was a pretty nicely scaled piece. He also said the columns going off into the distance are too strong (kind of why I put them in XD I just liked looking at them). I guess it’s because there’s too strong of a focal point. There’s nothing to move the piece from the back of the room around again to the front or even the middle. (But I still don’t understand the scale thing.)

Now I’m here. Need to eat dinner.

From about 1:30 (when we got out of art) to now I was stressing. meep. I felt like I had lots to do, and so little time to do it in (from that point until now, or when I have to go to art lecture), and I couldn’t do anything to change or lessen either problem. So I just didn’t do anything. *laugh* I just tried to make myself not stress.

I could have studied for art, but again I really don’t know what to study. I could read the book, but it’s really boring, and I don’t know what I’m supposed to get out of it. I find some stuff interesting, but of course it’s not what we’re supposed to be learning in the course and thusly get tested on for a grade. I looked over notes, but again I don’t know what we’re getting tested on and don’t know what to focus on and everything just goes over my head. It’s easier when it’s a technical subject, you understand how and then the quiz is easy. You don’t have to memorize stuff!

I could have written all the stuff I need for my art journal, but that would just remind me of all the work I still need to do and it would make me stress more.

I could have worked on drawing the guinea pig pictures on the computer but one: I didn’t want to turn on the computer (desktop) for such a measly amount of time, and two: I didn’t really want to get into something that I didn’ have the time for. I could do it tomorrow, I have practically the whole day and don’t need to interrupt my work to go somewhere. (Oh yeah I have to work on the pictorial space project.)

And … that’s all I really have to do. *nod* I’m currently working on validating the (X)HTML of all my websites. I didn’t want to do that either because I would just feel guilty goofing off when I have all this other stuff I need to do.

But I really should go eat dinner so I can stop stressing about that, then get ready to go to class and take the art final and come back and watch Gilmore Girls. woo!

should become castaway

“And sometimes this Blog is just a diary, or a reminder. You forget the things you were certain you would always remember, especially the tiny things, and all too often they’re the things that matter.”
Neil Gaiman, December 1, 2006

I know he said that in reference to his daughter, but dang I still love how he writes.

My teacher said in class: she’s lived in Michigan, where it snows, and when she was moving to California she thought, oh yay, the sun is always out! But it’s so cold here! Not outside, but inside. Her husband said “we have to go get sweaters!”

Hah, yeah, no one heats (public) buildings around here. >_> My mom’s even got the thermostat at home down to 66° since last winter. I never even gave that a second thought. Do other places heat to a comfortable level during the winter?

Yesterday I forgot to turn off the heater (we don’t have a thermostat) in the morning, so it was on pretty high all day until I got home at 5:30. Hidek and his friend had the windows open since they don’t know how to work the heater. -.- So I don’t have the heater on now, and I’m wearing a tank top, shirt, thermal top, sweatshirt, leggings, and sweatpants. Still a little cold though.

Wednesday night it was really cold. I think it went down to 42° while we were checking the weather. Thursday morning there was ice on my car! Only the rear window, but still! This one site Hidek’s friend checked said that average and record temperatures in SLO are more extreme than temperatures in Berkeley/Davis. O_o I understand the highs; they’re more north, so naturally it’s cooler. But the lows! How in the world can we get colder than the Bay area??? They get fog! It rains often there! We’re in what’s called the Gold Coast. (I think it’s a just marketing/tourist gimmick though.)

Last night I stayed up til 1:30 am working on my blog. XD; Moved the last of the pMachine entries to WordPress. No more pMachine floating around uselessly on my domain anymore, woohoo! Installed plugins for tags and weighted tags and for weighted categories. So now you’ll see those around.

rise in the morning, sleep in the dark

I think I’m giving up mentally. But that could just be today.

This morning I woke up at 6:45 so I could sign up for next quarter’s classes (yes I have a really late registration date *kills rhyme*). I had enough time to walk around my room to wake myself up (and prove to myself I wasn’t going to fall over) and pull on a sweatshirt and take out my retainers and make a cup of ocha. Woo, 15 minutes go by fast when you’re not awake!

After that it was fun. Somehow it zoomed from 7 to 7:30 (giving Livejournal layout help in that time wasn’t a good idea, I suppose) and I had just enough time to make eggohan and get my stuff (including undrunken ocha) and get to my car, where I spilled a little of my ocha and had to run back up to get a rag to wipe off the back window so I could see.

Then when I got back here, I tried to take a nap, or at least rest my eyes for a few minutes, but I couldn’t settle down, I kept getting up. Having a cup of ocha then half a Dr. Pepper at lunch was probably the cause. Even now I’m still moving. O_o Or that may just be some weird … sleep-deprived, half-awake thing…? I don’t know.

Then from 5-ish to 5:35 I put up my new layout and tried fixing things (still don’t know how to make the date show up for every entry). Then ate dinner for 10 minutes before I left for lecture.

Came back, watched Gilmore Girls and Veronica Mars. Odd, but I’m thinking of the VM episode more than I am of the GG one. (I just started watching VM this season; it’s right after Gilmore Girls, and I don’t feel like going to bed or getting on the computer. This is pretty much the one night of television that I have. Other than random Mythbusters viewings on Wednesdays, but I usually don’t because Tuesdays and Thursdays are my heaviest days.)

So. Layout. Um. It’s Natalie Portman. I was just looking through the galleries at NP.com and thought these were layout-able images. I had a lyric or something to go with it, but I couldn’t remember it, so no text other than flimsysilence-dot-net. I think I randomly picked the colors from the colors that were saved in my Photoshop from whatever project I’d worked on last. *laughs* I do that a lot.

fsgirl and more car problems

… I need a new layout up here. But I feel guilty when I think about taking this layout down. It’s like the girl I drew there IS flimsysilence. She’s the mascot. I can’t remover her!!

Just had a thought. I’ll stick her image up on the domain info page. Yeah. Good idea.

Anyway.

Um. I walked up three flights of stairs today twice. Why? First time to study. (For some reason I just really don’t like the idea of being someplace where it’s more crowded. Even at my last college, sometimes I didn’t like sitting at the desks because there were so many people around me.) Second time because I finished my midterm a lot sooner than I thought, and I had a lot of free time so I went to read Carrie. (I’m up to the big scary finale! *grin*)

On the way home my check engine light went on. Found out I haven’t had an oil change for 5000 miles. I guess I just forgot over the summer. >_> I remember being at 28000 miles! Why didn’t I remember to change the oil?!?! Grarr!! So I called the nearest Dodge dealership and I have to take my car in tomorrow as early as possible. Hoping I get my car back in time to get to class on Monday! Hoping I get my car back at all… (reference: see “car problems” entry)

blog-ness

I started this blog as a public version of my online diary, mainly for SM00 (who I don’t think reads this anymore). I recorded my day’s events here for a while. I don’t remember what changed that. Now I barely post anything personal here.

I tried becoming one of those bloggers with opinions, posting my thoughts, but I didn’t have so many thoughts outside myself. Then I wanted to have a kind of blog like Natalia’s. (I don’t know what kind of blog that is. Sort of personal.) But how could I have a blog for myself if I kept expecting people to comment, and not writing more entries if people didn’t comment?

(I suppose I should say “a blog for myself” would pretty much translate to an online public diary. Yes I know that sounds stupid and is stupid. It’s just what I wanted to do.)

So I turned off comments, just so that I would be keeping up my blog and writing entries solely for myself.

But now I feel lonely, and like this blog really were “a big dark echoing room” with no one but myself. On go the comments, and hopefully I’ll manage to keep my mind off of them, and still write whatever, for myself.

[comments closed to reduce spam; oh, the irony]